Um, even my parents just gave up on me just like, oh, well he's just gonna be a musician and. They're just like, Ugh, Derek, you know, like, he's just gonna be a musician. Um, so people gave up on me long ago and that was great. And I had super long hair and denim jackets and Ozzie Osborne Iron Maiden heavy metal patches on my denim jacket. I just wanna be a musician.Īnd they were all neat and proper and dressed nicely. And I was like, I'm not even going to college. Um, and all the people around me were all in like that college pre-prep kind of course. Wonder, why am I like this? And I think it's because I always think that too, because I think I, in high school, I grew up in like an upper middle-class suburb of Chicago. The story of what you're supposed to be and the only work you can commit to actually comes from within.ĭerek: Just because you're asking me some personal questions about my past, you just made me. I think the process for me was stripping away the outside view. Paul: Yeah, and I totally align with that. Like any idiot can buy a Ferrari, get a credit card, you go down to the shop and you hand them the card and they hand you the car and then you pay the debt. You wanna be somebody that can sit down in front of a blank computer terminal and make an app out of thin air from scratch? Or somebody that can sing wonderfully or somebody that can write a poem that can move you to me, to yearn, to be that person you want to be is ambitious, especially if you take action towards it. Um, you wanna be somebody that can stand up on stage and command a room. And they say no to everything else and they're driven and focused and you think I'd like to be like that.Īnd you really work towards it.
Pathless definition how to#
Present and that great of a listener, or I'd love to be that graceful, or, um, maybe you met somebody that really had their shit together, that knows exactly where they're going in life and exactly how to get there. Say like you've spent some time once with somebody that was a great listener and you think like, God, I'd love to be that. If you think about the skills that you really want to have, the talents you really wanna have or the kind of person you really want to be. Like, okay, let me put this into the second person. I honestly hadn't considered that, that in all my years of calling myself ambitious, it's always been for the self…it's always been about being the ideal me. So your parents, who cares what somebody else thinks? Paul : I'm much longer on the default path, Derek.ĭerek: Well now it's funny that you just mentioned this just now and I went like, Hmm. Who cares about others? Why? Why, why care what anybody else thinks? I'd honestly never even thought about it. But is this sort of deeper journey that is more in the heart than in the brainĭerek: See, in all of my hours of thinking about this, I have never brought in. Legible ambition is really hard to explain to others, even yourself. My definition is your parents can tell their friends about what you're up to. Paul: I've also called it legible versus legible ambition. I asked Derek how he thinks about ambition and Derek shared pretty openly about how he thinks about ambition and how that might have come from people “giving up” on him at 14: Why he thinks more people should focus on ideas that are “useful, not true” (also the name of his next book) I thought I’d share two of those things that stuck with me upon relistening today:ĭerek’s definition of “real ambition” and why it’s easy not to care what others think It’s usually a good signal that we’ll get along if you like how Derek thinks.
When I first met Angie, Derek’s book Anything You Want was one of the first books we talked about in our first week of dating. We riffed on a number of topics including moving to a different country, ambition, looking to comfort as a cue to shake things up, why Brian Eno inspires him, and his theory on why parenting seems so hard.īefore the interview, Derek shared that he had watched Angie and my episode we recorded a couple of months ago which was pretty cool. He also seems to be fully alive and excited about what he is creating, which is rare in today’s world. Derek has long been an inspiration with the way he seems to find secret portals to interesting ways to approach life. I had a delightful conversation with Derek Sivers a few weeks ago.
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